I see so much of myself in this. It's so fucking beautiful and heartbreaking simultaneously. I never realised how autism makes deep connection so difficult and how a part of me constantly screams that it wants to go home and another part of me says that, by being disconnected, I already am.
I learned the hard way that friendship is where a relationship should end up if it is to be successful long term. But, there also needs to be some passion.
I wish you deep friendship, love and the ability to be honest (not callus). Deep friendship is my goal with my wife, but I have trouble getting past my ego sometimes... She usually gently brings me back to my senses though. Selflessness (not a victim complex) is under rated.
This grabs one right in the chest. I have always been awed by your honesty. It is a thing to behold, the transparency of your expression. I smiled at the same time I got teary eyed at the same time I said a really heartfelt prayer for you and Nino. For those of us who grew up in the divorced families of the 80s, where the thought of friendly exes was an oxymoron, we are standing on bleachers cheering for the four of you to continue building what you have in this blog post. As a mom getting ready to send off my boy to college this Fall, I wanted to give you a big hug and cry a little commiserating with you, mom to mom. I really enjoy reading your writings about your social dynamics because of a loved one who is mildly Asperger’s. It would almost be impossible to tell except for the amount of work it takes for them to build and maintain friendships, even though they are such an awesome person otherwise. Caring and smart and ethical and so many things, but the friendship thing is definitely a nut to crack for them. It is amazing how insightful you are about that social dynamic.
I grew up working in my grandma's children's book store. In the 80s and 90s there were so few children's book stores that most big authors would make the rounds to those stores when they had a children's book published. I met Judy Blume, Eric Carle, Faith Ringgold. Of course I took it for granted then, but now I think it was special.
I see so much of myself in this. It's so fucking beautiful and heartbreaking simultaneously. I never realised how autism makes deep connection so difficult and how a part of me constantly screams that it wants to go home and another part of me says that, by being disconnected, I already am.
Thanks Graham. You summarize the push and pull of autistic relationships so well here. Really.
A beautiful and moving post. Best of luck with crafting a new kind of relationship.
Penny,
I learned the hard way that friendship is where a relationship should end up if it is to be successful long term. But, there also needs to be some passion.
I wish you deep friendship, love and the ability to be honest (not callus). Deep friendship is my goal with my wife, but I have trouble getting past my ego sometimes... She usually gently brings me back to my senses though. Selflessness (not a victim complex) is under rated.
Peace, D
This grabs one right in the chest. I have always been awed by your honesty. It is a thing to behold, the transparency of your expression. I smiled at the same time I got teary eyed at the same time I said a really heartfelt prayer for you and Nino. For those of us who grew up in the divorced families of the 80s, where the thought of friendly exes was an oxymoron, we are standing on bleachers cheering for the four of you to continue building what you have in this blog post. As a mom getting ready to send off my boy to college this Fall, I wanted to give you a big hug and cry a little commiserating with you, mom to mom. I really enjoy reading your writings about your social dynamics because of a loved one who is mildly Asperger’s. It would almost be impossible to tell except for the amount of work it takes for them to build and maintain friendships, even though they are such an awesome person otherwise. Caring and smart and ethical and so many things, but the friendship thing is definitely a nut to crack for them. It is amazing how insightful you are about that social dynamic.
Awww. I can feel the hope and heartache (good and bad) in your writing, Penelope. Great stuff.
How did you acquire an autographed first edition of 'Faith Ringgold’s 'Tar Beach'?
Did the two of you ever meet?
I grew up working in my grandma's children's book store. In the 80s and 90s there were so few children's book stores that most big authors would make the rounds to those stores when they had a children's book published. I met Judy Blume, Eric Carle, Faith Ringgold. Of course I took it for granted then, but now I think it was special.
Thank you for sharing this. It moved me.
❤️
Wow... Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your journey. I was touched. harold